Two nuns were shopping at a 7-Eleven on a blisteringly hot summer afternoon. The sun beat down on the pavement outside, and even inside the store, the air felt thick and sluggish despite the hum of the refrigerators.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
As they passed by the beer cooler, one nun slowed her steps and peered through the glass doors.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWouldn\u2019t a nice, cool beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening?\u201d she asked, fanning herself gently with her hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The second nun nearly tripped over her sensible shoes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIndeed it would, Sister,\u201d she replied carefully, lowering her voice, \u201cbut I would not feel comfortable buying beer. I am certain it would cause a scene at the checkout stand.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The first nun smiled \u2014 the kind of smile that suggested she already had a plan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI can handle that without a problem,\u201d she said calmly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Before the other nun could object, she reached into the cooler, picked up a six-pack of beer, and headed confidently toward the checkout counter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The cashier, a young man barely old enough to shave properly, froze when he saw them approaching. His eyes flicked from the nuns\u2019 habits\u2026 to the beer\u2026 and back again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He blinked once.
Then twice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The silence stretched awkwardly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Before he could say a word, the first nun leaned forward slightly and said, without hesitation:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWe use beer for washing our hair back at our nunnery. We call it Catholic shampoo<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The cashier stared at her.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Without blinking an eye, he reached under the counter and pulled out a package of pretzel sticks, setting them neatly beside the beer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThen you\u2019ll probably want these too,\u201d he said. \u201cThey\u2019re half-price.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The second nun gasped softly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhy on earth would we need pretzels?\u201d she whispered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The cashier shrugged. The first nun burst out laughing \u2014 an honest, joyful laugh that echoed through the aisles. Even the second nun couldn\u2019t help but smile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n They paid, thanked the cashier, and headed out the door.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That evening, back at the convent, the two nuns sat beneath the shade of an old oak tree in the courtyard. Cicadas buzzed in the distance, and the air was finally cooling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The first nun popped open a bottle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cTo clean hair,\u201d she said solemnly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The second nun hesitated for exactly three seconds\u2026 then accepted her own bottle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWell,\u201d she said, \u201cif we\u2019re committing this particular sin, we might as well do it properly.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n They clinked bottles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Just then, Sister Margaret \u2014 the strictest nun in the entire convent \u2014 appeared at the edge of the courtyard. Her eyes narrowed instantly when she saw the bottles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSisters,\u201d she said sharply, \u201cwhat exactly do you think you are doing?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The second nun froze.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The first nun stood calmly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cPersonal hygiene, Sister Margaret,\u201d she replied. \u201cWe\u2019re testing a new method.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sister Margaret looked at the bottles suspiciously.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThat\u2019s beer.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYes,\u201d the nun said. \u201cFor our hair.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sister Margaret raised an eyebrow. The nun took another sip, thought for a moment, and nodded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIt gives excellent body,\u201d she said. \u201cAnd a remarkable sense of peace.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sister Margaret sighed, shook her head, and turned to walk away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cJust don\u2019t let the bishop find out,\u201d she muttered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then she paused\u2026 turned back\u2026 and added quietly,<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIf you\u2019re going back to that store tomorrow, get me the dark ale. My hair\u2019s been feeling dry.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n And that, of course, is how the convent became known \u2014 at least to one very confused cashier \u2014 as the only place in town where beer sales mysteriously spiked every summer\u2026 all in the name of proper Catholic shampoo<\/em>. \ud83c\udf7a\ud83d\ude07<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Two nuns were shopping at a 7-Eleven on a blisteringly hot summer afternoon. The sun beat down on<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4909,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4908","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-world"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4908","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4908"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4908\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4910,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4908\/revisions\/4910"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4909"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4908"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4908"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4908"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\u201cEvery shampoo needs conditioner.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDoes it work?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n