There was once a sheep farmer who needed help with the difficult task of castrating some of his inferior male sheep so they wouldn\u2019t breed with the females.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He hired a French man who didn\u2019t speak English, but he was a very hard worker.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
After the first day, they had successfully castrated fourteen sheep. The French worker was about to throw away the \u201cparts,\u201d but the farmer shouted:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNO! Don\u2019t throw those away! My wife fries them up and we eat them. They\u2019re delicious \u2014 we call them sheep fries!<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Later that evening, the French hired hand sat down for supper and tasted the dish for the first time. Indeed, the \u201csheep fries\u201d were surprisingly tasty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The next day, they castrated sixteen sheep, and again enjoyed another supper of hot, crispy sheep fries.<\/p>\n\n\n\n On the third day, however, when the farmer came home, he didn\u2019t see his French worker anywhere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Confused, he asked his wife, She shook her head and said:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou know, it was the weirdest thing! I told him\u2026”<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201c\u2026I told him to wash up because dinner was almost ready. But he looked at me, absolutely horrified<\/em>, and said, \u2018Non, non, madame\u2026 I can no longer do zis!\u2019 Then he ran out the door and disappeared down the road!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The farmer frowned. His wife shrugged. \u201cHe looked pale. Like he saw a ghost.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The farmer scratched his head, grabbed his jacket, and headed out to search for the man. After about fifteen minutes, he spotted the French worker sitting by a fence post, staring into the distance like a soldier who had seen too much.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The farmer approached quietly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYou okay, son?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The French man didn\u2019t look at him. \u201cMonsieur\u2026 I cannot\u2026 I cannot<\/em> eat\u2026 how you say\u2026 zat many sheep balls again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The farmer chuckled. \u201cWell, you seemed to like them the first two days!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cOui, oui,\u201d the French man said, waving his hands dramatically. \u201cZey were\u2026 how you say\u2026 acceptable. Crunchy. But today\u2014\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n He gagged, holding his stomach.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhat happened today?\u201d the farmer asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The Frenchman turned toward him slowly, eyes wide with trauma.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cMonsieur\u2026 today we castrated thirty-three<\/strong> sheep.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The farmer blinked. \u201cAnd?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd when I came inside\u2026 Madame had cooked them ALL!<\/em> She was standing there with two giant pans\u2026 smiling at me\u2026 saying, \u2018Supper\u2019s ready!\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The farmer tried not to laugh, but his shoulders shook. \u201cSo?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cSo?!\u201d The Frenchman jumped to his feet. \u201cOne plate, monsieur\u2026 ONE PLATE had so many \u2018sheep fries\u2019 it could feed an entire village! I thought it was a joke. But no\u2026 she expected me to EAT THEM.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n He shivered, clutching himself. The farmer laughed so hard he almost fell over. \u201cSon, she meant them for the whole family! Not just you!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The Frenchman froze.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cShe\u2026 she did?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cYes!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n He blinked several times as if processing information that could have saved him from emotional collapse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then he slowly sat back down. \u201cSo\u2026 I did not need to finish the entire plate?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNo!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd she was not testing my\u2026 how you say\u2026 masculinit\u00e9?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cNo!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAnd it is not a tradition in America to eat all of zis alone?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cGood lord, no.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The French worker placed his face in his hands and let out a long sigh of relief.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cMon dieu\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The farmer clapped him on the back. \u201cCome on. Let\u2019s go back. My wife\u2019s making mashed potatoes tonight.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The Frenchman smiled weakly. They walked back to the house, but when they stepped inside, they heard the farmer\u2019s wife cheerfully call out from the kitchen:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cDinner\u2019s ready! I made EXTRA sheep fries, just in case!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n The French worker collapsed onto the floor.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" There was once a sheep farmer who needed help with the difficult task of castrating some of his<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3741,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3740","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-world"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3740","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3740"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3740\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3742,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3740\/revisions\/3742"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3741"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3740"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3740"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/states-news.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3740"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\u201cWhere\u2019s the French hired hand?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat do you mean he can\u2019t do this anymore? Wasn\u2019t he working fine this morning?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI cannot do zis anymore. I am just one man! I cannot eat thirteen pounds of\u2026 of\u2026\u201d
He whispered, as if afraid someone might hear:
\u201c\u2026testicules de mouton.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAh\u2026 mashed potatoes\u2026 A dish without consequences.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n